Clever girl!

April 4th, 2010 at 3:04PM

subwaydouchery:

SUBWAY DOUCHERY : RAAAAAAT!
“You touch me, I yell rat.” - Ferris Bueller
I’m a touch hung over, hop on my downtown F train, doors close behind me, everyone is screaming and I’m pretty sure I’m about to die. Then a rat ran over my shoes. After I stopped screaming like the delicate little lady I truly am, I couldn’t help but think how heavy the rat felt on my feet.
Then MTA sprang into action, the conductor left his booth wielding what I can only describe as a cricket bat. He loudly inquired, “WHERE….IS IT?” He pounded it out of it’s hiding place, after several S.O.S calls the doors finally opened, and the rat scurried to freedom!
Check out the two grown men standing on the bench! Like two precious southern ladies after a mouse ran into the parlor! I was standing on the bench as well, it’s not like I expected them to tackle the rat then eat it alive, but it’s still adorable!
*** From The Douchery Reserve, taken this morning. Keep on Douchin’ ***

Ok, granted, I have had pet rats (which are fucking adorable & awesome & make better pets than any other rodent, except maybe another kind of rat), so I may be a smidge biased, but this kind of behavior is not only ridiculous, but unnecessary.
1) You’re much bigger than the rat2) Rats are not stupid3) An intelligent creature does not attack something that is literally thousands of times its size unless said intelligent creature has nuclear artillery (or some such) attached to it.4) Rats do not make or carry nuclear artillery.5) From the description of events, the rat was trying to get away from the big, scary, smelly people.
all of this to say:
Subway rats are more scared of you than you are of them. Ever notice how they scurry away when people get too close? Yeah, locate your nuts, though, cuz it looks like they rolled away, & they’re probably small enough for a young rat to carry off for a midnight snack.

SUBWAY DOUCHERY : RAAAAAAT!

“You touch me, I yell rat.” - Ferris Bueller

I’m a touch hung over, hop on my downtown F train, doors close behind me, everyone is screaming and I’m pretty sure I’m about to die. Then a rat ran over my shoes. After I stopped screaming like the delicate little lady I truly am, I couldn’t help but think how heavy the rat felt on my feet.

Then MTA sprang into action, the conductor left his booth wielding what I can only describe as a cricket bat. He loudly inquired, “WHERE….IS IT?” He pounded it out of it’s hiding place, after several S.O.S calls the doors finally opened, and the rat scurried to freedom!

Check out the two grown men standing on the bench! Like two precious southern ladies after a mouse ran into the parlor! I was standing on the bench as well, it’s not like I expected them to tackle the rat then eat it alive, but it’s still adorable!

*** From The Douchery Reserve, taken this morning. Keep on Douchin’ ***

Ok, granted, I have had pet rats (which are fucking adorable & awesome & make better pets than any other rodent, except maybe another kind of rat), so I may be a smidge biased, but this kind of behavior is not only ridiculous, but unnecessary.

1) You’re much bigger than the rat
2) Rats are not stupid
3) An intelligent creature does not attack something that is literally thousands of times its size unless said intelligent creature has nuclear artillery (or some such) attached to it.
4) Rats do not make or carry nuclear artillery.
5) From the description of events, the rat was trying to get away from the big, scary, smelly people.

all of this to say:

Subway rats are more scared of you than you are of them. Ever notice how they scurry away when people get too close? Yeah, locate your nuts, though, cuz it looks like they rolled away, & they’re probably small enough for a young rat to carry off for a midnight snack.